Coming from someone who has many a Grinch like quality within her, I swear these are all true. Take a look at my 11 signs you are a Christmas Grinch and let me know if you fit the bill!
You can’t stand people who put their tree up the day after halloween
Like, are you actually for real? It’s November – calm yourself down. Your tree goes up as close to Christmas as possible. Actually, you might not even put a tree up full stop because you hate Christmas that much. If you’re someone that feels they need to hide their Grinchness, you might opt for a slightly chavvy Fibre Optic tree to pretend to the family that you’re interested when in fact, you are not. (I can say it’s chavvy because my Nan used to have one lol).
You purposely scroll past people on Instagram/Facebook who start posting pictures of their festive fun
Not today, not ever.
You think Michael Bublé should stay in hibernation
He only ever comes out at Christmas, but you’re one of the only people who thinks he shouldn’t bother. Christmas songs are cringe – end of.
You think Christmas is a pointless exercise that just makes you fat
You start to question if you’d normally eat an entire box of celebrations to yourself mid-week. You realise you probably wouldn’t and that it’s Christmas you have to blame for the fact you’ll be rolling into the new year.
On that note, you can’t be bothered with people asking if you’ve put a mince pie out for Santa…
…because you’ve eaten it yourself and you’re too ashamed to admit that. Unlucky Santa Hun, better luck next year.
You hate that you can never find anything ‘normal’ to wear
You’re fed up of going shopping, trying things on and feeling like you’re a contestant on Strictly. Christmas signifies glitter and sequin overload and you are NOT here for it. Bring back the all-black outfits ASAP.
Christmas ruins your anti-social nature
You like being in bed by 9pm and avoiding human interaction as much as possible. Why is it that family and friends think they can just ‘pop in’ and see you over the holidays? Like hello, did I invite you?
Even though you’re a self-confessed Grinch, you are fuming if anyone points it out
Did I give you permission to be a little bitch? No. Didn’t think so. Go back to your Christmas filled life and leave me alone.
Christmas jumper day in the office is your worst nightmare
Why? Well, revert to the previous point. You HAVE to wear one because otherwise Karen from HR starts asking you if you’re okay and why you’re not feeling the festive spirit. Bore off Karen.
The whole Christmas experience brings you anxiety
Because people have been banging on about it since OCTOBER and it’s getting a bit much. How are you supposed to take any enjoyment from a day that people just won’t stop raving about? It kills it off and makes it seem more exciting than it is. There’s always one person as well who on 1st November is bragging about the fact they’ve bought all their presents and this just sends you into a spell of doom and regret.
You end up enjoying something about Christmas and you absolutely hate the fact you do
Woah, what’s happening? Have I just cracked a smile in December? Who am I? You hate to admit it, but there’s usually something about Christmas that makes you happy. If you’re a basic bitch, that’s probably the fact that gingerbread lattes are now in stock and you’re buzzing about it. It’s fine to enjoy that, but don’t over do it…. you are a Christmas Grinch after all.
I’m intrigued to see which side of the fence you’re on – pop a comment to tell me. Are you a Christmas fanatic or a full blown Grinch that can’t wait til it’s over?